Wednesday, November 24, 2010

“True knowledge exists in knowing that you know nothing.”


Everyone knows someone who thinks he knows everything and he usually shows up for Thanksgiving dinner. It’s almost as if the turkey platter placed on the table is a cue to wind it up and talk nonstop. Let’s call this person Uncle Albert just for reference sake. Any similarities to someone with the name Albert are purely coincidental. I don’t even know an Albert.

Uncle Albert people can be women too. It’s amazing anyone is that smart. I remember when I was a kid asking an Uncle Albert person how she knew so much. She just smiled as if I had extended a gushing compliment. She had an answer for everything. I wondered if she made some of it up. Did all she do was read when she wasn’t talking?

At dinner, Uncle Alberts always have a better story to top one someone else might get to tell while he is chewing. If someone at the table just finished their first 5K run, he or she just ran their fourth marathon. If someone’s child just won a $5,000.00 scholarship, his kid got a full, four year ride. If someone starts a discussion about the rising cost of electricity, he knows everyone on the committee who makes decisions for the electric company. He will not be outdone by anyone in anything.

I’ve gotten to the point I feel sorry for Uncle Albert people. First of all, they must collapse into bed every night from all the talking they do. They may know facts and important people, but they don’t know how to listen or be kind, patient, and humble.

So headed into the holidays remember this: don’t ever try to out do an Uncle Albert, it won’t happen.

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